What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

So theres this Jew, right? He got shot to death.

Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

Knock Knock Come in

Caolan and Eamon

As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm? Lebron traveled

What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits

Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

Why didnt the poor black man have cell phone service? Because seven eight nine.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? Two piles of dead babies.

Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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