How do you make sure a kangaroo gets the right breakfast? Make sure it doesn't get the wrong breakfast

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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YO FACE

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

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why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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Pain Olympics.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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Whats better than having 5 dollars? Having 5 dollars and a pizza

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What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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