Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

Why do all black people have AIDS? Because they deserve it.

Where did suzie go for her Birthday? A van

A drunk guy walks into a bar. He orders a beer and the bartender says "Hey pal, you look and act really drunk, I don't think I can serve you any more alcohol." The man looks up to the bartender and says "You're right, I'm really drunk."

What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

Pain Olympics.

What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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