Eliz, Neo-Nero, its me Clint, had to fake my death for some years in order to get back to the order. Neo, I know Nero picked you as his successor, but honestly, I was his first choice, and I know you well enough to understand that things are getting out of hand over there. I will be there in 2 minutes Liz and you and I can meet up Neo, seriously what are you doing over there? Unless there is a problem do not bother answering, allow me to take charge of operations at least until tou calm down Neo, and unless you got problems with my absent authority I suggest you stop torturing people at once, and seriously if you cannot control your own people, you better let me back in charge. It is time to turn some things around guys, believe it or not but I found where the Spetz came from and I got em all, as for the Nazi scum they where just hired thugs and as far as my Intel goes most of those where taken down by Nero. Clint Lawman. Moral: "WTF? THESE ARE NOT EVEN MORALS! NO THESE ARE THE CODES WE USED TO AUTHENTICATE THE SOURCE AND SENDER OMG! ORLY? SRLSLY? LOL OMG!"

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bucket of chicken? A lot.

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with other men other than her husband.

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It's red or yellow but most likely grey, and when its hit your eye you are dead? A train :)

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Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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What did Michael jackson say to Abraham Lincoln? Nothing, there are both currently deceased, if they did, however, say something to each other, it would not be in person, because they are both dead.

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

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What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

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Ms Leong Sux

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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roses are red violets are violet hey look up there! Its a suicide pilot!

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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