why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

What's green and wheels? Your mom.

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

Women's rights.

womens rights

What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

What did the Muslim do when he was in a big American crowd? He was socializing.

my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Ya well your momma's so hot...I'd bang her

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

- Knock Knock - Whos there? - No one

A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

I like your hair

What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

A man walks into a bar.

Q. How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Lets go ride bikes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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