Yo mama's so fat she has diabetes.

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So, this joke isn't funny.

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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So there's this one Cheerio who really likes this frosted Cheerio. He walks up to her one day and asks her out. She responded, "no I only date frosted Cheerios." The Cheerio then went and got a tutor, he became very, very smart and turned into a multi-grain Cheerio. He goes up to the frosted Cheerio and asks her out. "no, you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he gets a gym membership and works really, really hard and becomes and apple cinnamon Cheerio. He asks her out again, "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." so he goes to church too and becomes a honey nut Cheerio. "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he focuses and tries even harder than ever before and finally becomes a frosted Cheerio. He asks her out, "will you be my girlfriend? I heard about this party this weekend we can go to." she answers, "I'll be your girlfriend, let's go to that party." So, they go to this party. The boy asks. "do you want anything to drink?" the girl says "sure maybe some wine." the boy en goes to the wine store. There's a super long line and he waits and waits but goes back to the party. He tells her and asks her if she wants anything else. "some soda maybe." he goes to the soda shop and there's another long line and he waits until he can't take it and goes back again. He tells h and asks her if she wants anything else. "some punch please." He goes to the punch store, and there's no punch line.

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What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Q. Whats black and rhymes with Snoop? A. Dr Dre

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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