Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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Caramel Boing.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

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What's the difference a black person and a park bench? A park bench is a object and a black person is human.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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A man was caught cross dressing by his wife. She divorced him.

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Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops