What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? Its Greg. I forgot my keys, can you let me back in?

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so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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What did the fisherman say to the other fisherman? Were both fishermen

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when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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What did the homosexual community have last night? A protest for gay rights.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

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knock knock who's there? hope

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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