Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

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1+1= 69

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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How do you wake Lady GaGa up? set her alarm for a reasonable hour.

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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Wana hear something dirty? Mud

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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A dirty joke: The white horse fell in the mud.

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There once was a girl from Nantucket, I've heard its nice there this time of year.

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Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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