So this blonde walks into a library.

WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

Wanna hear a joke? No.

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson was a child molester.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

Q: Why was the blonde so dumb? A: Because she wasn't properly educated.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

Knock Knock? WHAT?!?!?

Wife: My husband is dead! Son: Sounds like a personal problem.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

who just made fun of katie matt

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

live babies

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...