A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

How many fingers am i holding up? 4

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

how do you get a happy man to stop smiling? hit him in the face repeatedly untill he is dead.

A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

your mom.

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...