roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

what are three short words? i a am

Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

What's red and a cow? Red cow

What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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