how man

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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If Jewish men light a menorah during Hanukkah, what do Jewish women light? Jewish women light a menorah as well; Judaism is a relatively fair religion to both sexes.

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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Chuck Norris.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

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I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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Yo mamas so fat she's over weight

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops