Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

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What's the difference between a gay person and a Nazi? No gay person systematically murdered 6 million people.

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

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Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Why did the boy collect poop? Because it was it was his dogs shit.

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What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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