A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

The number 69 is? Just a plain old number that has just as much meaning as 68 and 70.

- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

why did the asian man get straight A's? because he worked hard and studied everyday

what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

tim tebow is a grat quarterback

Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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