roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

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If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

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A man walks into a bar. Wait, no, it was a horse. A man walks into a horse

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

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cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer cancer

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What do you call a tortilla from venezuela? A tortilla.

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Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

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there are 2 men standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is called Peter

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops