A child walks into a bar. He finds to find his dad passed out in his vomit, the bartender realizes the dad left the kid in the car, and he is arrested. The kid grows up traumatized by the experience, and becomes a substance abuser just like his dad.

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What happened to the man who jumped off a plane while riding a donkey? He died.

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what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? The black man is a human being with all of man's well-deserved rights, and the large pizza is an edible item. Furthermore, the black man, if adult and employed, has the propensity to feed a family of four far longer than a large pizza can.

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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knock,knock whos there? teddybear. teddybear who? a teddybear killed your family.

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

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i dont care if you rate me or not

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Betty. Answer the door!

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What did the commentor say when he saw the "waht's worse than finding a worm in your apple...the holocaust." joke? I am offended to your cruel referance to worms.

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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How do you make a plumber cry? I'm sorry but our princess is in another castle.

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whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

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A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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