Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

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Why was the black Jew sad? He had to sit at the back of the oven

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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What's red and a cow? Red cow

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your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

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what did lois call peter when she first saw him? i dont dont know do you?

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

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How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

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what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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