What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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Hey

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Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

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Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

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How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

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I went out back to bury my hoe.. with a hoe..

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I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

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What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops