the power to turn magnetism into light

Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

^ That's not even funny ^

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

How do you get a ninja to do a backflip? Ask him nicely.

What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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