Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why do you want to know? And what did the censor get? Okay okay you are not boring nor stale nor anything, please increase the effect of this thing, its not working very well when I try to.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the kangaroo die? Because two stapled koalas fell on its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Beka has AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Guy A walks into a bar and sits down beside guy B, they quickly spark up a quick conversation about golf, Guy B says "i hit the ball so hard, it soared 200 yards", Guy A quickly responds by saying "I hit your mom so hard!" Guy B responds "the jokes on you, my mom has herpes"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the rooster get for his birthday? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A blind man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at the man for a moment, then asks : - Excuse me, sir. Are you blind ? And the blind man says : - Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops