Your mama's so skinny; she can fit into most swimsuits sizes 4-6 and has a rather petite bottom.

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Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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A: knock knock B: who's there A:come in B:come in who?

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? REVENGE

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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b

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Laura Pratz... not having a strong urge to tweet everything that happens in her life.

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oh hai i'm al gore reduce ur carbon footprint lolz

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A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

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Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

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Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

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What does samios search on google? Shemale gey big t.it lactating big c.ock An.al tearing Ana.l dilation school girl rape compilation

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

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Kameron Brown is gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops