What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

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19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

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What's 1+1? 4.

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Why was the little girl lying on the floor? Because she had no arms or legs.

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What a wonderfuuuul wooorld: Would this not be a wonderful world if we instead of killing innocent children, just gRaped them hard and painfully in every damn hole and let them go home? Ad: Consider the life of the poor children, Just 0rape them hard!... For love! Awww... Moral: What moral You see any moral here? XD No Not Nerometal, I am that "leader of the Neronist... whatever" Yes, that is who I am. Real moral: "Seriously who is gonna listen to some kid who is just (severely) butthurt anyway huh? Cut their tongues off! Just do not kill them... For a wonderful world..." <3 (Not a heart lol)

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

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why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

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this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

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What happens when you cut Chuck Norris? He bleeds

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What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops