Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

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Hey, you have small hands.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Nickelback

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family how do you kill the plumbers family with a wrench

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Winking at old people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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