Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

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A women gets on a bus, the bus driver says 'that is the ugliest baby i have ever seen!' the women pays for her ticket and sits on one of the seats while the bus pulls off.

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A man walks into a bar.

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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A straight man walks into a gay bar and is amazed by the amount of fun he has and how cool people can be when you don't judge someone based on sexual preference or your own religious beliefs.

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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Women's rights

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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Patient: "Doctor, I've got a strawberry stuck up my bum." Doctor: "I've got some cream for that."

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What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

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"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops