can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

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I don't get it

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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the WNBA.

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What happened to the boy after his life saving surgery? He died of an unrelated disease.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

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jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops