FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the octopus say to the lion? Nothing, because the likely hood of a lion and an octopus meeting is incredibly slim, as an octopus is a sea creature, and a lion isn't. A lion and an octopus cant even communicate with each other anyway, so even if they did come across each other they wouldn’t be able to talk. Octopi are also anti-social creatures by nature so I can say with some confidence that the lion and the octopus will not have a convocation. Written By JAMES!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

It says so on your cap.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the pepper say to Mr. Peno? Hallo peno!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

how do you save a baby from drowning? Take your foot off the back of its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the mobia strip? To get to the same side!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops