What was the pirates favorite letter? Q.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: Do these jeans make me look fat? A: No your fat makes you look fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

once there was an anti-joke. it wasn't well thought out or even very creative. what happened to the anti-joke's premise? it got undermined or reversed in the punchline. but the punchline was way too straightforward. so, the whole joke really ended up sucking.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the blade of grass say to the other blade of grass? Nothing, as grass does not have the capability of speaking and does not have a brain, all it has is a complex life system where it feeds off water. If it were to say anything though, it would say, "Hey! We're both blades of grass!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

thumb_up thumb_down -8

a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

thumb_up thumb_down -8

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the kangaroo die? Because two stapled koalas fell on its head.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do you make a homosexual man have sex with a woman? shit in her vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops