Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Tom: God! Matt:Where? Tom:Matt i was saying God ! Jesus! Matt: God and Jesus! wow! Tom: why am i talking to you? Matt: Wanna play a game? Tom:bye.

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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Click here to end the world.

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it ran away and it's coop was on the other side of the road

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Your momma's so fat that she went on a diet.

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Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Nothing, it's still a dinosaur! Her sexual orientation is regardless. ~kyle hudson

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I did it. the Bulls fan Took a few hours on Microsoft word. then I copy and pasted it on this!

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Hey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops