Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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A man walks into a bar a browning automatic rifle, it accidentally fires hitting the main artery in his neck and he promptly bleeds to death.

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yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

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What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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asdasdasdasd

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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