have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

what do you call a gay guy? kevin

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

Who is the fattest mexican on the earth? Not Osama because he's dead...and he wasn't mexican..

What's more painful than having your girlfriend cheat on you and leave you? Having your **** bitten off slowly.

What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

What do you call a panda without a head? Dead.

Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

why are chickens dying so fast? because black people are hungry.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

What do you call a 2 storied house ? A dolphin! :D

Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

Ross.

yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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