- Anti Joke

I'm Spartacus

Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

I you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

I love you very much.

Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

mitt romney

What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

Five guys one rape.

What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

A dad is very proud of his son for just having graduated preschool. he tells him son, ill get you anything you want. he says i want a pink pingpong ball. the dad is confused but he does it anyway. the next year, he graduates kindergarten. the dad asks the same question. the son this time says i want 10 pink pingpong balls. so the dad, very confused, does it. 5 years later, he graduates elementary school. this time he says 100 pink pingpong balls. high school the dad says cmon your going to college ANYTHING! A CAR? A HOUSE? no i want 1,000 pink pingpong balls. the kid then goes to college and 4 years later and majors in african relief. the dad is very proud but he says. lemme guess? 10,000 pink ping pong balls? YEP. the kid goes to africa to help out because he's a good person. he then meets his wife helping out there also. they get married and the dad flies out to africa to see the wedding. he then knows that he needs 100,000 pink pingpong balls shipped in. the dad goes back to the US and 9 months later finds out that he is a grandfather. he ships 1,000,000 pink ping pong balls into africa. a few years later he finds out that his son contracted a rare african disease and is going to die very soon. now the father is deeply in debt from all the ping pong balls, so his community helps him raise money to go to africa. he meets his son on his death bed. and they talk for a long time. the dad finally says. yknow son i really need to ask you, why did you ask for all those ping pong balls? the son says: "Well dad, I--" and then he dies

Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

Why did the woman die? She was hit by a bus.

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

A man walks into a bar. He's blind.

A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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