Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

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guess what?

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

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A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

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What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

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If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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youre gay

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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I can't see my forehead

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A black man killed someone

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What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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