A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

don't do anything i wouldn't do first

Two Irish men walk in to a bar. Or maybe it was three. It's actually quite a common occurrence here in Dublin.

red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

whats the differnce between a white boy and a black boy? skin color

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

what draws the line between sex and rape? a pen

Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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