"Merry Christmas, Mom! My gift to you is...ME!" "I brought you into this life you disrespectful brat!" He then proceeds to a cliff.

Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

3

A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

What happened when the car hit the man? He died.

What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

Wait! hundred billions!

What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

I was going to write about anti-climaxes but then I didn't.

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

Women's Rights

Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk. Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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