How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stoplight turned green

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

the midget went to the midget store

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

thumb_up thumb_down -5

It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a computer running Windows DOS? Obselete

thumb_up thumb_down -5

antonio has a penis head.lol

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops