Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

I love you.

David: Hey dude, I'm so hungry! Jose: Yeah me too David: Wanna get some food? Jose: No, I lied.

A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

What was wrong with the tree? Nothing

black

anti-joke teehee

What did one umbrella say to the other umbrella? Nothing, umbrellas cannot instigate a conversation, because they cannot talk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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