Q: Why can't Helen Keller have a baby? A: Because she is dead. ...I IS HORNY!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Female Athletics

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's 6 + 9? 15.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

where did napolean keep his armies? In his sleevies!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why was six afraid of seven? Well, seven has a huge drinking problem. He killed a man in a bar fight once. He is also very intense about his boxing career. He works out so hard that he is huge. He has enormous anger problems as well. Seven isn't the only one with problem though. Six is a Vietnam veteran and has been easily scared ever since he came home. The psychiatrist says he has a bad case of paranoia. Just something about seven reminds six of the soldiers that killed his friends. Also seven ate nine, and cannibals are SCARY!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Has anyone seen Stevie Wonder's new car?! Nobody seen it?! He too!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

This is a joke for Homeless people:

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Hair

thumb_up thumb_down -42

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops