Why do we park in driveways and drive in parkways? Good question.

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Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

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knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a scratch 'n' sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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What's got four legs but can't move by itself? A chair.

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I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

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What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rober-to. What do you call a black guy with a big toe? Tobe Bryant

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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