How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

Yes!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!! Yes!!!

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

What did the man say to the cat. ~It doesn't matter it impossible for 2 Species to Communicate between one another.

What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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