A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

What has two legs? Half a cat

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

Roses are red Violents are blue Oranges

Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

A muslim walks out of a plane.

Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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