What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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Knock Knock Come in!

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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Women rights..

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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I got shot, you laughed

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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A Christian and a Jew walk into a bar. The bartender says "What'll you two have to drink?" The Christian says "I'll have a beer." and get this, the Jew says................................"I'll have a beer too."

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Why did the plane crash Because Joe diragi is so fat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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