there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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NEVER

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JUSTIN BEING SMART

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tim tebow is a great quarterback

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

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What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

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"What was the hardest thing about that kid getting killed by that bus." "What?" "My dick"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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