how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

Women's rights.

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Your momma's so fat, that if the word for fat was "plachow" I'd say "yeah your momma, she's a little bit plachow."

BIG PENIS

what do an elephant, a fishook, and a spaceship have in common? absolutely nothing

What is bad at catch The twin towers

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

Like my status for a tbh?

Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

Where to, sir? Forward.

Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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