What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

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nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

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Why did the black homeowner declare bankruptcy on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by continuing to pay his mortgage bills.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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Sir, your wife is dead

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops