How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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Why do black people like chicken? Because it's tasty, nutritious and easy to cook.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Why did the black man get sent to prison? He had committed many crimes and was finally caught by the police.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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What is the the mistake..... 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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What did the old lady call the black pilot who's name was Marcus? Marcus

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Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

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Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican; the black man had too much alcohol and the Mexican was the designated driver.

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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What's annoying and wears glasses? The kid next to you

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How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

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sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops