How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

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Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

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why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

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what is worse than falling off a bridge? .. getting pushed off a bridge

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why are asians such bad drivers? Cause they constantly have their eyes closed.

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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How do you piss off a blind person? Tell him to piss in a round room.

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How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

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man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

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ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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