whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did tiarnan not ride hi bike to school today? Tiarnans dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the chicken cross the road it didnt

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops