Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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A man was going to take his girlfriend to prom, and decided to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners. Unfortunately, there was a long line. He then went to pick up some flowers for his date, but there was a long flower line. Finally, he takes his date to prom and decides to get some punch for them.He returns with the refreshing beverage and the couple has a wonderful time.

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What worse than being shot? Waking up and finding a penis in your mouth.

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Statistics show That people with the most birthdays Live the longest

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

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What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

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If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set in her backyard? Neither did she.

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Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

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Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

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What does the hulk do when he's angry? Compulsively masturbate.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse says "my wife has cancer"

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wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops