A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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a boy poops in class everybody laughs and now he has no friends

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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Shltskc gw? G

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

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why was the little boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops