what rhymes with sloth? rape

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

What's worse than being human? Nothing... No I literally mean nothing at all. Like not being anything?

Two ducks are in a pond. The one duck asks, "Can you pass the soap?" The other duck says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?"

What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

An Amish walks into Best Buy

Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

A dad is very proud of his son for just having graduated preschool. he tells him son, ill get you anything you want. he says i want a pink pingpong ball. the dad is confused but he does it anyway. the next year, he graduates kindergarten. the dad asks the same question. the son this time says i want 10 pink pingpong balls. so the dad, very confused, does it. 5 years later, he graduates elementary school. this time he says 100 pink pingpong balls. high school the dad says cmon your going to college ANYTHING! A CAR? A HOUSE? no i want 1,000 pink pingpong balls. the kid then goes to college and 4 years later and majors in african relief. the dad is very proud but he says. lemme guess? 10,000 pink ping pong balls? YEP. the kid goes to africa to help out because he's a good person. he then meets his wife helping out there also. they get married and the dad flies out to africa to see the wedding. he then knows that he needs 100,000 pink pingpong balls shipped in. the dad goes back to the US and 9 months later finds out that he is a grandfather. he ships 1,000,000 pink ping pong balls into africa. a few years later he finds out that his son contracted a rare african disease and is going to die very soon. now the father is deeply in debt from all the ping pong balls, so his community helps him raise money to go to africa. he meets his son on his death bed. and they talk for a long time. the dad finally says. yknow son i really need to ask you, why did you ask for all those ping pong balls? the son says: "Well dad, I--" and then he dies

All dead all doom or all dead? How can you choose the question doesn't make sense. dead all dooom ohhhaklsdjfla;ksdjfal;skfjasd

Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

what do you call a black guy on steroids? a black guy on steroids

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

I can't see my forehead

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

One drunk bug looks over to another drunk bug and guess what it says? Your a glitch

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...