When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I AM DISSAPOINTED

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the girl drop her lolly pop? She was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I'm Spartacus

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black pilot? a pilot you racist bastard...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what rhymes with sloth? rape

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops